Thoughts on the MTV Movie Awards

The following are thoughts I had while watching the MTV Movie Awards with my kids.

• OMG Robert Pattinson is SO cute!

(C'mon, I'm certainly not the OLDEST woman to be thinking that same thought!)

• OMG How creepy is it that my DAUGHTER is thinking the same exact thing?

(Get a grip and tame that inner cougar.)

• Andy Samberg is funny... Andy Samberg WITHOUT his pants on is not funny.

• You know, Andy Samberg can make a fart joke and it just falls flat with me but then he flashes that little boy grin and it's just like listening to an 8 yr. old kid do something inappropriate and then look all innocent... You just want to laugh and hug 'em... However if you laugh and tell him he's cute, he'll more than likely grow up just like Andy Samberg... But instead of being a successful comedian he'll probably be getting the shit kicked out of him at a neighborhood bar.

• Kristin Stewart is always grabbing her hair, that must be a nervous habit and it's really annoying.

• I might enjoy Eminem more if I could understand the lyrics to this rap. Seriously MTV, audio is a rather important part of a music channel. Wait, Oh, that's right you don't feature music anymore do you?

• The fact that Twilight is winning all these awards is making my daughter SO happy and thus it's making me very happy too!

• I'm really curious what the folks at MTV think about the fact that their voting/viewing audience is comprised of mostly pre-pubescent girls?

• WHY, WHY, WHY MTV... did we HAVE to watch that guy jacking off with the golden popcorn award? Are you not aware that I'm watching this show with my KIDS? And what about ALL those pre-pubescent girls?

• Thinking maybe this is WHY MTV pushes the envelope on taste. Perhaps this is their method for weeding out the Hannah Montana fans.

• Sacha Baron Cohen with his butt cheeks hanging out? Yeah, seen it before with Howard Stern... How freakin' original MTV and then trying to make us believe that Eminem was all pissed about it... Have you NO original ideas?

• Amy Poehler, come back to SNL... I miss you!

• I wonder how pissed the people are over at 'Harry Potter' that the viewing audience is FAR more interested in seeing the clip from 'New Moon'?

• Jim Carrey, still pretty damn funny and hey, even HE wants Robert Pattinson.

• I rather enjoy this parody of the Oscar's with the presentation of the award for Ben Stiller but I'm getting a little sick of Keifer Sutherland playing his bit so far over the top... Tone it down dude, you're supposed to be going for laughs and instead you're just annoying the hell out of me.

Fortunately my kids are old enough I didn't have to acknowledge the inappropriateness that popped up every now and then during the show. It is however a very unpleasant and awkward situation to witness a guy pretending to jack-off to a popcorn statue while you're sitting between you 19 yr. old son and your 16 yr. old daughter.

Thanks for the memories MTV*


*that's sarcasm folks.