Land of the Lost...
Friday night my kids began wondering aloud to me about the exact time they were born. I made a 'guesstimate' but that wasn't good enough. My daughter wanted to wake her brother on his birthday at the exact moment he was born.
"Okay, Okay!" I said, "I happen to know EXACTLY where your birth certificates are and I'll just get them for you." Two years ago we went on a family cruise vacation and I remembered having to take birth certificates along for proof of citizenship. Being 'over-the-top organized' I purchased a state of the art organizational 'Trapper Keeper' for every important paper we'd need for the trip. Ever since then I've reminded myself that's where all of the important papers are contained in case I need them. So all smug and sure of myself I immediately located my state of the art organizational 'Trapper Keeper' from my closet shelf and began leafing through the important papers within. Saying aloud, "Here we are." Only to find that the folder which I thought had contained the birth certificates was completely void of important papers. In fact, each and ever paper within my all important state of the art organizational 'Trapper Keeper' was completely worthless. Why in the world would I need to keep papers detailing shore excursions, the daily news aboard ship and at least 5 family portraits for which we paid FAR too much money and each and every family member looks like the village idiot?
"Okay, don't panic!" I tell myself. Surely the birth certificates are in the file cabinent in the office.... NOPE! Then maybe they're in this bin or that shelf?.... NOPE!... NOPE!... NOPE!... NOPE! A little bit of panic sets in, but after all it's not the end of the world if our kids don't know the exact minute they were born. I tried to search through a couple of bookshelves for the kids baby scrapbooks I made years ago, but I couldn't even find those. Truth is, at that point I was tired and not trying very hard. "Not that important." I repeat to myself.
This morning my husband calls me from work to explain that the company insurance policy is going through a procedural update and needs to verify the birth of dependants on the policy. (Don't you just love the irony here?) And yes, by May 1st... Each employee covered under said insurance policy, must send a copy of their dependants birth certificates. Wee bit of panic beginning to set in now.
I have one last shining hope before I have to tear the entire house apart... And that is 'The Safe Deposit Box'. It is my fervent hope that the day I took the birth certificates OUT of the all important, state of the art, organizational 'Trapper Keeper', I was suffering from some form of fog as I have absolutely no memory whatsoever of ever having returned those important papers to their proper place.
I don't know what's worse... Not being able to find the birth certificates or going to the safe deposit box and finding them safely tucked away. Then having to come to the realization that it is indeed time to start taking Alzheimer's meds. and picking out a nice Elder-Care facility.
"Okay, Okay!" I said, "I happen to know EXACTLY where your birth certificates are and I'll just get them for you." Two years ago we went on a family cruise vacation and I remembered having to take birth certificates along for proof of citizenship. Being 'over-the-top organized' I purchased a state of the art organizational 'Trapper Keeper' for every important paper we'd need for the trip. Ever since then I've reminded myself that's where all of the important papers are contained in case I need them. So all smug and sure of myself I immediately located my state of the art organizational 'Trapper Keeper' from my closet shelf and began leafing through the important papers within. Saying aloud, "Here we are." Only to find that the folder which I thought had contained the birth certificates was completely void of important papers. In fact, each and ever paper within my all important state of the art organizational 'Trapper Keeper' was completely worthless. Why in the world would I need to keep papers detailing shore excursions, the daily news aboard ship and at least 5 family portraits for which we paid FAR too much money and each and every family member looks like the village idiot?
"Okay, don't panic!" I tell myself. Surely the birth certificates are in the file cabinent in the office.... NOPE! Then maybe they're in this bin or that shelf?.... NOPE!... NOPE!... NOPE!... NOPE! A little bit of panic sets in, but after all it's not the end of the world if our kids don't know the exact minute they were born. I tried to search through a couple of bookshelves for the kids baby scrapbooks I made years ago, but I couldn't even find those. Truth is, at that point I was tired and not trying very hard. "Not that important." I repeat to myself.
This morning my husband calls me from work to explain that the company insurance policy is going through a procedural update and needs to verify the birth of dependants on the policy. (Don't you just love the irony here?) And yes, by May 1st... Each employee covered under said insurance policy, must send a copy of their dependants birth certificates. Wee bit of panic beginning to set in now.
I have one last shining hope before I have to tear the entire house apart... And that is 'The Safe Deposit Box'. It is my fervent hope that the day I took the birth certificates OUT of the all important, state of the art, organizational 'Trapper Keeper', I was suffering from some form of fog as I have absolutely no memory whatsoever of ever having returned those important papers to their proper place.
I don't know what's worse... Not being able to find the birth certificates or going to the safe deposit box and finding them safely tucked away. Then having to come to the realization that it is indeed time to start taking Alzheimer's meds. and picking out a nice Elder-Care facility.
Labels: absurdities, Frustrations, Life
posted by EmBee at 9:17 AM
1 Comments:
Thanks for stopping by and leaving a comment. Actually that school is right across the street and it's no longer in use. But I didn't manage to use it for some great shots!
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