I am Ringo

When it comes to music groups the greatest of all time has to be 'The Beatles'*

January 4th, I started a business with 5 other women. We're all in this together, each bringing our strengths in order to build a phenomenal business. But I really gotta be honest here and say two of these women, Lynn & Patti are the real rock stars. In fact, Lynn & Patti are the John Lennon & Paul McCartney of the business.

Instead of rhyming lyrics, Lynn performs bookkeeping magic, handling ALL of the sales figures, making sure the artists get paid, the bills get paid and working desperately hard to keep us flush, or something close to it.


For all the work Lynn does with the money, Patti works an equal amount of magic by managing not only all of our printed business materials and our website and mail lists but also works as a liaison for all of our artists and potential artists.


As for me, I'm Ringo. I struggle to keep the beat.
And every once in a while I compose something like this:


And like my blog posts... Here's something COMPLETELY random...
Paul McCartney makes Mashed Potatoes:



*I'm not going to even entertain an argument on this topic because it's fact, an absolute fact!

Funny But Oh SO True...

Late at night 'Computer Boy' scours the inner-nets for stuff to amuse me.

The link is pure comedic gold, mostly because there's great humor in simple truth.

Enjoy!
http://theoatmeal.com/comics/printers

Remember When?

I remember when my kids were little and all my friends were so jealous because my little ones were such great sleepers.

Now my kids are grown... and the sleeping thing? Well it's just not cute anymore and I doubt my friends consider me the lucky one.

Hey, it's 1:00 in the afternoon, do you know where my kids are?
Still sleeping.... Grrrrrr!

Beat The Clock

Is it true, tomorrow makes us only 9 short days away from Christmas? But how can that be?

• I just started MY shopping today.
• I have just half of my Christmas cards signed and addressed.
  
• While we DID manage to get the tree up and the house decorated, my living and family room are littered with storage containers, unused strands of lights and all those magazines I managed to purge which now need to be taken to the recycling center. (It was one of those stupid activities which had me thinking I had an unlimited amount of extra time on my hands.
• Oh and let's see, what else? There's that little matter of landing another front page story in the local newspaper about donating my gift wrapping services to raise money for our local hospice foundation. Either people are going to forget about the article OR this time next week, I'm gonna be up to my eyeballs in gift wrap.
  

Little wonder I don't seem to be able to catch up to the speed of those hands spinning around the face of the clock on my wall... But you know what? I'm still able to take deep cleansing breaths.... It'll all get done... And if it doesn't? Nobody's really going to care because I'm fortunate my kids have reached the age where they're not asking how many days 'til Christmas but instead saying, "Are you freakin' kidding me, there's ONLY 9 days 'til Christmas?... *deep breath* *deep breath*

Gotta' love it!

My Mood In Food

The above photo pretty much sums up where my head is right now.
Because of Halloween?...... Nope!
Because my braces just got tightened?.... Possibly, but No. *damn my mouth hurts*
Because my house is a pig sty?....... Any other time, Maybe.
Because I've got a meeting tomorrow with a group of artists to open a co-op, in a huge shop on Main street, for the holiday season.... Which means there's like a million and one details to consider and a paltry sum of art for me to sell?...... Bingo!

So why am I spending precious time blogging?....... Here's an answer for you, why does a deer freeze in the headlights?

Recipe for Life

As an extended birthday celebration, the family went out to my FAVORITE restaurant on Saturday night... 'Sweetwater Tavern' in Merrifield, Virginia. Even though the place is obnoxiously loud and the wait interminable, the food is so incredibly superior, it makes all other food hang its head in shame.

The most amazing item on their menu... No, I mean ONE of the most amazing items on their menu, is their 'Chop House Salad'... Think, sweet yet tangy buttermilk dressing, romaine letttuce, basil, roasted corn *damn I hate it when I drool all over my keyboard*

So as I sat there extolling the merits of my delicious salad to my sister-in-law, she said, "Why don't you ask them for the recipe?" I explained to her that I had a pretty good idea the recipe was a closely guarded secret. In fact, there were probably ninjas protecting a safe in anti-chamber under the kitchen, along with a 3 headed dog and... Well, you get the idea.

After an appetizer of mouth watering Calamari and the tavern's amazing basket of donut like rolls and herbed butter, the family sat eagerly awaiting the main course. That's when a lovely little Asian woman walked up to our table, introduced herself as the manager and politely apologized for the wait but added the kitchen was just finishing a fresh batch of their redskin, basil mashed potatoes... and did we mind the wait? Even fresher potatoes? Of course not! But that's when my sister-in-law popped up with, "You can make it up to us by giving us the recipe for the 'Chop House Salad'." For a moment I thought the manager might go all ninja on us but instead she replied with, "Well, I can give you a list of the ingredients... Would that be all right?" "YES, YES, that would be wonderful!" I piped up!

Roughly 5 minutes later, after our freshly made potatoes were sitting before us, mine with a heap of delicately roasted chicken... Everyone elses topped with salmon... The manager handed us a tiny 3" square piece of paper, listing the ingredients for the 'Chop House Salad'... But here's the thing...

It's JUST the ingredients...
No measurements...
Just a random list of ingredients...

Yes, it puts me one step closer to being able to make this, oh so delicious salad, in my very own kitchen... HOWEVER, I see this as kind of a metaphor for my life...

It's like yeah, I know what the ingredients are but exactly how much and when and how to mix it all together? Well, that's the REAL question!

So, does anyone know where I can find 'Champagne Vinegar?'

My Life Is A Lot Like My Tupperware Cabinet

Roughly a year ago I completely organized the cabinet in my kitchen I refer to as 'The Tupperware Cabinet'. This is the cabinet which holds all my storage containers for leftovers and a bunch of misc. plastic stuff.

A year ago, my Tupperware Cabinet was in a word, Beautiful... A completely organized creation. I had lids sorted by size in a slotted, re-purposed, plastic office sorter. I had bowls nested according to size and nestled in cake carriers... I'm telling you, it was organization at its finest!

Today, my Tupperware Cabinet is a mess! Items are tossed in and the door is quickly closed before anything can fall out on the floor. When I'm in search of a storage container, I go through the frustrating chore of searching through piles of plastic to find the right sized item. The search for a matching lid is like running the gauntlet on a Japanese game show... The Tupperware Cabinet is a deep corner cabinet and I'm telling you, one could get lost trying to reach into the back of the thing.

Now, I'm well aware the Tupperware Cabinet didn't become a mess overnight. These things happen over time... One unloads the dishwasher in a rush and rather then nest that large bowl under those smaller bowls, you just toss it on top. Eventually what you've got is Tupperware Jenga.

So I'm in the shower this morning, following my 3 mile walk and subsequent weigh in and I'm thinking to myself... "Self, you've let yourself go, just like that damn Tupperware Cabinet!" One second helping at a time, one bowl of ice cream before bed... It's just like resting the larger bowl on top of the smaller one or tossing that lid where it doesn't belong. The bitch of it is, I could spend 30 minutes and get the Tupperware Cabinet reorganized (and I plan to get to it this week) but it's gonna take a hell of a lot longer to reorganize this body... But I'm working on it. As of today, I've lost 5 lbs.

Here's a link to my I-pod song of the day... I don't know what the hell he's trying to say with these lyrics but it makes for a damn fine tune to pound out a walk.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XuEEvH_PAoc

The Season of Wretched Excess Draws to a Close

Before someone asks me, "When are you due?" I'm announcing TO-DAY that this is IT! My season of wretched excess has come to a close. I'm putting this out to the universe because I know if I keep something like this bottled up in my head, it's a lot easier for temptation to get the best of me and no one is the wiser... Except for that little nagging imp in my head and she's pretty easy to shut up with a bowl of chocolate ice cream.

SO, today I started a food diary... AGAIN*... And I'm about ready to head out to the store to purchase a new bathroom scale because the one we've got... that fancy digital gadget... it broke about a month after we got it. So I'll just blame all this extra girth on the bathroom scale.............. Nah, I know it's my fault. I know I haven't turned down an extra helping of well, ANYTHING, for the last several months.

Why now? Why today? Because last night as I sat down with a magazine and a generous helping of leftover chocolate cake, every damn article in the magazine was about weight management...
For instance: 'Conquer What You CRAVE'... 'The Mother Load - Sometimes it's hard to solve food issues until you untangle them from Mom issues'... 'Don't Eat Out (Without Reading This)'... And the most obnoxious of all, 'This Is What Happy Looks Like'.

With each bite of my cake I felt a little more guilty, like me sitting down with this magazine, and this portion of cake was in some way a cosmic bitch slap! Okay Universe, I get your point!

This morning I drove to the walking park along with our poor old dog Anna and with my i-pod ear buds firmly implanted in my skull, I drug poor Anna's ass over the nearly 3 mile track, heat, humidity and all. I'm like this the first day with anything... TOTALLY PUMPED! And if I'm not pumped tomorrow or the next day, or the next?... Well, too late, I already put it out to the Universe.

*4 years ago I kept a food diary and lost 30+ pounds. Writing down everything I ate really worked for me.

Passenger Seat Hell

*If you eventually read this son, I'm sorry. I just couldn't hold the angst in any longer so I'm putting out to the universe.

He's completed the 'Instruction' part of the Driver's Training School. Now he's on to the actual 'Driver's Training' and that's all well and good, as long as I don't have to play the role of 'Instructor.' I know he wants to practice... I know he needs to practice... It's just the Practicing that's got me all tied up in knots.

It's become obvious that I just don't have what it takes to sit silently and let the learning take it's course. I'm a control freak... Doesn't he know that... A Control FREAK! So when he stops a half-mile short of the stop sign, I want to say, "Why are you stopping HERE, a half-mile from the stop sign?" And when he turns a corner while shuffling his hands along the steering wheel, I want to say, "Haven't you EVER paid attention to how Dad and I steer when we drive?"... Or when he creeps down the road with a line of cars stacked up behind him... Or when he took that turn too fast... Or that other turn too slow?... Or when he made that turn yesterday going the wrong way on the divided street and then yelled at me because I told him to go left without pointing out the street was in fact divided, even though this surely wasn't the first time he'd been on that street, how was I to know it was the first time he'd actually been paying attention?

I try to relax and not pay too much attention, even sit back and close my eyes, you know? I mean, I doubt he's at the point where he's going to hit anyone, but he's definitely at the point where he's most certainly annoying 99% of the other drivers on the road. But he's gotta learn, right? He's gotta learn. And I have to just stick a pin in it, in order to keep myself from going off... But DAMN, it's not easy for a Control Freak like me.

*Shaking head* Nope, it sure aint easy, for a Control Freak like me.

The Greenening

I thought it would look nice. I mean, I REALLY thought it would work. I spent ALL day yesterday painting... ALL DAY! Give it a chance I thought, you know it always dries darker. Today when I look at the walls I want to cry. Seriously, the master bath looks like a cross of either a mental hospital or an ice-cream shop.

What will I be doing today?
*sigh*
Repainting.

Top 10 Signs - You're No Longer Liviing In A Hotel Room

1. Several hours after leaving your room, your bed is STILL unmade.
2. The bathroom towels are on the floor right where you left them.
3. The toilet paper ends aren't folded into neat little triangles.
4. There are only 3 tiny sheets of toilet paper left on the roll and not a replacement roll in sight.
5. No mini fridge.
6. No ice bucket in your room.
7. No balcony off your bedroom.
8. Day 3 and no one has scrubbed out the shower.
9. There aren't any tiny little bottles of shampoo, conditioner or lotion on your bathroom counter.
10. Your television viewing isn't interrupted by the sounds of fornicating on the other side of your bedroom wall. (It only happened once but when you're sitting next to your daughter who says, "Is that what I think it is?" you want to crawl into a hole and die of embarrassment.)